imperfect poems

Poems

raw and imperfect on purpose

 

winter is coming

My life goes in cycles like tree’s leaves. Short days and cold nights make brittle branches. What’s the worst about breaking is spraying shrapnel. Shooting splinters and seeing who falls victim to my fallout. Hopefully, this rain brings changes. It’s my turn now to share some shade. I’ll be needing greenery. For the summer sun beats down, and the heat dries my leaves. I still still stand tall as they fall. Chilled to the bone by a north wind. The weather is changing, and so begins my cycle again.

Work Week

What if my grandma dies

While Iʼm off working

What if my whole life

Passes by

And I

Don’t notice

Because Iʼm caught up

And Iʼm sitting in

A coffee shop

And I canʼt think of

What I thought of

Earlier

Im tired and I lied

With my smile

Earlier

Because it makes me sad

To watch as you

Fall apart

What the fuck?

Will happen by fall?

And the whole time

Ill be fucking gone

Working

Honestly Iʼm more

Than annoyed

And it might be the

Clouds and the rain

But I canʼt stop

My brain.

From saying I should quit.

I think that Iʼve had it

But I’ll show up

Again on Monday

then I’ll be gone

For the week

And upon my return

I’ll see youʼve grown

More weak

And I grow more meek

As I recede inside of

Me

I wonʼt say what I feel

I need

because I feel

The need

to please

So I’ll see you again

Next week

today.

i fucking cried.

American Dream

 raise finger gently

screaming mentally free

 never stop me

don’t need ur greed

Keep your american dream

away from me

I raise both fingers high, in a gesture of defiance, to what’s expected of me

I’ll never step foot in your box, you cant trap me, I dance to the rhythm of

my own heart, and if you can’t keep up, It doesnt mean,

I’m off beat, you probably just cant see, what I do,

you think, I’m flying blinded, couldn’t be more misguided,

my intuition is what guides me, explore me through writing, and I’m always finding

unlimited potential, I’m no longer confidential

 planting my thoughts, feeding the seeds, and seeing growth

every few years, damned near someone else,

 swear to god, won’t fall victim to the spell,

suppression of self is personal hell,

but it’s good for the system, so never listen,

 puff on green tree, raise finger gently, screaming,

I’m mentally free, you can never stop me.

I don’t need ur greed, Keep your American Dream

away from me.

CARPE DIEM

I was 17 I tattooed my forearm

With a reminder of how fast a life can go

I’m ever aware of my impending end

I wear it to remind me to live life

momentarily and to be me

Unabashedly for the world to see

I want to be salt of the earth when I die

I want my old bones to be ground down

by the stones of the earth

by the time I die

I want know those that I’ve loved

To hold me dear as I pass on to my next life

I want to die my with friends near to me

when I die

I want to say I saw the world

I was born into and explored a bit

and becomed a friend or two

when I die I want to be ready to go

because I know

I found those that were dear to me

and it’ll be so clear to me

that I lived the life I was meant to live to

and then I’ll let go

MOM

I smiled in this photo for you mom

Don’t get me wrong I don’t want to die

I hope I live a long life

but when I go

I hope you know

I tried and I’m sorry

I couldn’t live an ordinary life

Don’t bury my head below a stone

and don’t cry more than you need to

instead

plant me beneath a tree

so you can see me grow again

and when it storms

sit beneath my leaves and read poems to me

COFFEE SHOP CYPHER

What if we quit pretending Everything in life Wasn’t a spectrum.Why do we focus on

A and B when clearlyEveryone lies in-between The lines.the world is full of lies

and I’m fed Up. God damn it Keep yo head up. Only see shadeWhen you hang in the shadows.

Hear only hate When you listen To whispers. I’ve had it And you’ve missed The point.

Listen You have control of You’re whole existence. The piece that was missing Is inside of you.

Listen Nobody has control of What life throws at them. Listen or you’ll miss it. 3rd eye blinded

When you shut the Shutters. Sun fades away The shade when You open the blinds.

Open your mind. Listen It’s time to get it. Quit fucking Quitting. You are the ruler

Of your own existence. If you listen: Be a mistic, Get a grip, Quit slipping, put ya fist up, Pass the blunt, Chin up, Everyones sinning, Life’s no contest, There is no winning. I work everyday. yet I forget The cheddar. I’m working for Something better. I repeat I Don’t work for pesos. I work for me. I’m my own boss. I’m my own company. You see I’m free. From the disease Kardashian fans Suffer from. Blinded by silicone They’re blinded By diamonds.when the sky Is so brightly Shining

Blinded by silicone. I mean to each their own. Look up sometime And see what’s shown.

just might be Your mind is blown. Don’t participate In the rat race cause rat race takes place

In a maze. Where everyone takes Last place. Instead, Open your eyes And see another’s.

It’s only then you See each other. It’s a gift To love another. Keep me warm When it’s not summer.

Safe from storms Be my shelter. Moms and grams and me we Love each other.

  

DARK MATTER

The sunshines, A million miles Away, from everything

My music is too loud, who complains,

about The rain, when it makes this,

i can’t catch my feet, I missed the ducklings,

As they swam by, amillion Miskito bites,

In less than five, minutes slip away,

too far away, for a strangers glance,

To reach me, I’m keeping to myself,

Sometimes, I just need, to be alone

Because my phone, buzzes, more than

Than Miskitos, and I can’t, keep running

This many miles, in a minute,
I’m fucking finished, and I never wanted,

to play in the race, so I’ve found a place,

In space, where not even, sun rays

Can reach me

depression

Insight to my life is depression holds tight

Rise up each day to gloom that encroaches

Upon sensitive subjects

dampen my demeanor With overcast grey,

demons scream

Sometimes feel I was born just to fight like,

a knight in the night, bright sword Held tight,

dreamless existence

what to do, with my sins,

if I’m wrong, does god still take me,

searching solum, for something better,

than this

Dreamless existence

Struggle to climb out, from under,

stormy weather, Often tethered to,

negativeness, in this,

Mess

Birds stay grounded, broken feathers

Ankle chains around, my brains and my wrist

need of angel wings, to free the feeling,

amiss often drifting, directionless,

in this,

Dreamless existence

ME.ME.ME

Sometimes it’s okay, to be selfish, it’s hard enough

To get by, in this life, without worrying,

About what’s right for, everyone else, it’s hard enough,

it’s not always easy, to look out, for yourself,

Selfishness is, sometimes, misconstrued,

It’s not always from, an evil point of view,

Friendship is, a constant conflict, of what’s right

For who, but all you can do, is speak your truth,

Honesty the best policy, so be honest

With yourself, un-acted actions, wreak havoc,

So all you can do, is what is right for you,

And pray, your loved ones, see you through,

And hope that, they’re doing it too

no see you

When I take my glasses off

I’m in a world all my own

everything is blurry

And I feel alone

But that’s what I needed

Isn’t it

When I take my glasses off

The only thing I can see

Is what’s in front of me

And I’m here with you

And there’s ten other

people In the room

and the only one

I see is you

When I take my glasses off

I dont care what they think

As I walk by

I can’t see

the look on their face

I’m in a safe place

No one can get to me

When I take my glasses off.

planted

I’ve only spoken a few words, in the last

Few days, wish to wash, moodiness

Away, my bed is a snare trap,

Keeping me pinned down, listen

To music, but barely hear, the sound,

Anxious chatter is too loud,

Inside of me, I felt dead,

so I never left my bed.

READ: if you dont like me

Lost sight of the words

The fire that was in me died

grandpa stayed up too late

Couldn’t go outside

to smoke

When I wanted to

haven’t picked up my pen

in weeks

I’ve been keeping busy

no time to waste

over distaste

If I’m hated.

honestly I

Couldn’t be more pleased

You can see yourself out

I don’t have time

For this shit anymore

Forgetting false opinions

from fakers who don’t sin

How many false friends

Spread fallacies

why never when

they look upon my face

How many smiles

Are worn to disguise?

The hatred

My heart is aching

But it’s not

I’m not worried

About you twats

I hardly give you

A second thought

I’m only writing

So you can see

You say you saw

What I thought

My heart is aching

but its not

together we wrote this

Grab your breathe kid.

bend the knee

clinch the dirt /

friends or foes

death’s a dose/

 of medicine i’m not prepared to choke down./

I can’t remember what I wrote now/

dig in deep time’s the key/

pray quad’s the clover/

that’s my only hope now/

I can’t get that part down./

LOVE ME./

take the labels and forget them/

My afflictions don’t make me broken/

the syndrome I suffer from is human/

I really don’t know what I’m doing/

I guess I’m floating along nicely/

and I’m sick and tired of fighting/

The other half of me daily/

let go of everything that holds me down/

I want to be around the ones I love/

I know what comes from above/

Set me free from the chain/

that bounds me to the ground/

I want to be around the ones that love me /

Counts on clock down/

Who’s not around now/

trousers tattered/

Things don’t matter/

I’m not impressed/

Vacancy has come/

Whats begun how/

now that were broken/

Its too late the words are spoken/

false imagery won’t sit with me/

Because  pageantry isn’t flattering/

Are you impressed with false images/

Spoken to be heard/

With no token for the machine/

It knows what you think/

it demands we give in/

Infantry on tv/

Lies spoken, but never noticed/

As we move closer to assimilation/

in a nation, congregations/

Tied up and broken, strangled and choken/

No one says the truth/

Liars rule the roost/

Lies are spoken to/

Cowards tooth and tooth/

who,

Fight for shiny things/

Bend knees to false kings/

Orange man is speaking/

plastically unblinking/

we watch Kardashians/

as kids die in fires/

That we’ve made/

Everyday,

we dont speak up/

fuck. we never look away/

From our phones/

And we’re  never alone/

Instragram produces clones/

What happened to each his own/

Comb your teeth

And Brush your hair/

life is free of fair/

float a prayer/

Dont be scared/

Grab the dirt/

Its on your shirt/

Bloody but not hurt/

Stumble stumble slur/

I don’t miss her/

Empty bottles broken novels/

Over words never spoken/

Is poetry just false imagery/

why post for the world to see/

does it represent the real me/